Dear Mrs. Crabby,

I have a theological issue that is really bugging me. My pastor always says that we are made in God’s image. Is this a superficial tenet? Is it really just all about looks? And if this is true, why then is there such diversity in our looks vis-a-vis different races?

If it is more than superficial, then it follows that God is imperfect. Because we are inherently flawed and imperfect.

When I try to discuss this with my pastor, he just pats me on the head and tells me how cute I am and that I think too much and can I bring cupcakes to Bible Study. This really pisses me off, just because I am a 5’1″ woman and a good baker.

I’d really like to know before I dismiss religion as an insult to human dignity. Or cook ex-lax into the cupcakes.


Head Exploding


Dear H.E.,

You poor hon, with such confusing thoughts wrestling around your mind on a weekend! I’ll do my best to answer.

One of the Genesis creation story versions tell us that God created us in his image, male and female. This tends to suggest that God is a hermaphrodite. But then, we are in fact two separate genders, so perhaps God is a married couple. Wouldn’t that explain all the contradictions? The word is clearly “image”, unlike Paul’s deconstruction of “image” by appealing to “reason.” Whatever the hell that means.

John 4 says that God is Spirit. Being in the New Testament, and written by John, whose writings sometimes suggest the ingestion of controlled substances, one suspects this might be a new thought conceit that seeks to explain the discrepancies of the literal interpretation of “God’s image” presented as the nonsensical folkloric idea that we look like the guy. Unless, of course, God is actually a multi-faced being with a most interesting shaped head. I find this idea rather endearing.

Reason and theology are sometimes mutually exclusive. This is not to suggest that there is no possibility of a connection. No. I would say that most pastors are limited by the dogmatic restrictions of their denominational prejudices. No one religion uses all the body bits in their hokey pokey.

I would suggest to you to read. Everything theological. Then I would suggest that you take science courses. Lots of physics, some neurobiology and definitely physical anthropology. Then cooking classes for a change of pace.

Now, digest this information by traveling, talking to people, doing yoga, having great sex and enjoying beautiful scenery.

You may not be any more enlightened than you are today, hon. But you will have a lot more information and will have had some great adventures.

Don’t stop asking those questions!

IB Crabby

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