With all the various fusses and doings in the world, there is one upcoming event that is being sorely neglected. And that is the alleged impending arrival of our galactic neighbors.

Past world leaders have been prepared to greet the visitors –

See how warm and welcoming President Bush is? He is not expressing any shock or concern at the visitor’s nudity. He just offers a warm handshake. Well, we are hoping that that is the visitor’s “hand” anyway.

I will offer my preparatory ombudsman services here. But I have to say, not knowing exactly why they are coming, I will withdraw at the arrival and let someone else take credit.

Given that:


~We have maintained your airfield for convenient landings:

We certainly apologize for the lack of a snack bar or baggage carousel. The brown zone is for loading and unloading of passengers only. All others will be towed.

~We have many lovely accommodations to offer during your stay:

….some of which are very pretty:

~If your traveling ships require refueling, we have lots of this to offer:

~It is our sincere hope that you have come to make friends and not to eat us or strip mine our planet faster than we are doing it. Or to take vast numbers of our people to work as slaves on your ships. But if you do require strong workers, here is where the best and strongest can be found, in places like this:

Take them up into your ships and way way out into space. Then just add water. They will pop up ready to do your gnarliest jobs!!

Thank you for coming to visit us. We hope you enjoy your stay.

The Earth.

Tell Mrs. Crabby all!

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.