Dear Hons,

Here are some ways to keep cool in this summer’s coming heat:

~Take a small hot water bottle and fill it with ice water. Wear this inside your underpants. Front side recommended if you sit a lot all day.

~Don’t eat large meals. Eat lots of small ones. Better yet, just pick off the plates of restaurant patrons you pass by. This saves money too, hons!

~Clothing choice, one word hons: Muu Muus. Well, one word twice anyway. Go to Hilo Hatties and get you some of these. Wear without any underwear for most cooling effect.

~Avoid those raised eyebrows over your sweat soaked armpits. If you keep all your clothing wet all the time, no one will notice and you’ll feel cool all over! Double win, hons!

And the best excuse for not staying cool –
~Hire an obscenely attractive person to follow you around wearing minimal clothing while fanning you all day.

Breezy kisses!
IB Crabby

1 thought on “SUMMER “COOL” TIPS

  1. you could also simply move to the poles.

    just avoid eating the Penguins…. takes ages to get the wrappers off
    (stick to Hobnobs)

Tell Mrs. Crabby all!

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.